Rebound

I recently applied for a position and was rejected.

That's a fairly common storyline, but I really felt confident and certain that I would obtain the position. The interview went well, and I put a large amount of effort in the application packet. Unfortunately, it didn't work out, and I'm left feeling inadequate and incompetent. No amount of sweet and generous words can compensate for an introduction of "We regret to inform you…." Initially, I was pretty disappointed – as one could expect. But that feeling was only temporary, as I quick came out of my rut.

The reality is that I didn't get my desired job, and no amount of depression and moping would change that. So I had to begin the process of rebounding.

First, I reminded myself that I was still very successful in my own right. Holding three jobs while being a successful full time student isn't easy and is a task not many individuals can maintain. Not many individuals can sustain themselves completely based off of student loans and their bi-weekly paycheck. I didn't need this new position to be a successful individual. In fact, not getting the position was probably best, as now I can focus on improving the areas I am already invested and involved in. I am looking forward to the challenges of being a third year mentor and stepping up to maximize the acknowledged potential of our team, I am excited to be promoted into the Training department of Student Computing Services with the intention of increasing the production of the department and I am thrilled to continue recruiting and assisting the Office of Enrollment Management as a Cougar Connector, the student ambassador for the university. I also intend to use my time to continue to increase my focus on school and my GPA. The new position would have required a minimum of 10 hours a week, on top of the 20+ I was already putting in my other three positions. It's probably best I didn't get it.

Next, after I had assured myself that I was still a successful person and that it was best I didn't get the position; I looked objectively at reasons why I didn't get it. It's never easy to self-criticize, but I find that "you are your own worst critic," and blunt criticism won't come from any external source – it has to come from within. After analyzing my flaws and weaknesses, I began to take an even more difficult task – I began to look at ways to correct these flaws. Some were correctable for future interviews and positions, others required a process of self-improvement and self-education, all of them could only be revealed after I experienced this form of failure. As long as I can make these adjustments, I will retroactively be thankful for being rejected.

Finally, I ran down what I had to be thankful for. My friends, my family and my situation in life are all positive aspects I have going for me. Many have not been given the blessings and opportunities I have, and I am so thankful for what I have.

Life isn't easy and is admittedly based on chance, but I refuse to let luck and my weak background determine my success. Although I missed this shot, I'm going to rebound back and follow up with a better one.

Compensation

I love doing favors for others. When I assist someone, I put myself in a position where my gifts, ability and blessings are used not for selfish purposes - but for making the lives of others better.

I grew up with little and never believed I had the connections or resources to help others. But as I grow older, I find that I've either gained resources or believe that you don't need much to give. Probably some combination of both.

I really believe that helping others will one day lead to others helping you in a time of need. It may not be the exact same person giving back, but life works out in the end.

Recently I had the oppertunity to do a big favor for someone else. The experience in this case was disappointing. Why? Because I didn't really feel appriciated.

It would have been different if an attempt at compensation or grattitude was expressed. But it didn't happen and I left the situation drained and unhappy. It bugs me weeks later.

But I'm glad I went through this experience. It reminds me that I need to express my thanks when others help me. I should offer compensation on big favors, but at the very least, I need to openly and expressively be thankful for their help.

Not only does it make the one being helped appear to have manners, but it makes the helper feel valueable and important - a trait we all need to feel as human beings.


-- Post From My iPhone

Success

I watched a talk by John Wooden today on TED, and one thing stood out to me.

For those who don't know, John Wooden is considered to be the best college basketball coach of all time.

John Wooden told the audience that his father told him to never compare himself to someone else. Success is not defined by your accomplishments in contrast to your peers and neighbors. It is defined by the achievement of your potential.

So, with this in mind, John Wooden believes that you can lose despite scoring more points than the other team, and you can win when you are outscored. The media and critics may tell you otherwise, but you as long as your play and perform to your potential; you have nothing to be ashamed of.

And this made me think of a Bible parable which never made much sense – until now.

The Bible has a parable which began with a master who gave three servants a task of holding onto money in the amount of 10, 5 and 1 respectively – the currency standard is irrelevant at this point. When the master came back, the servants entrusted with 10 and 5 were able to double their amount and returned their master 20 and 10 monies. However, the servant given 1 took it and buried it in the ground, and only returned the master 1 when it came time to return it to the master. The master berated this servant and cast him away from his resources and protection.

I thought that was harsh and unfair, as it wasn't like he lost it or spent it – and he was given very little to begin with. But now I realize why he failed. He made no effort to reach his full potential and do the best with what he was given. It was unlikely that he was going to give back the master 10 or 20, but he could have given back 2 or 3.

Don't define your success by comparing yourself to others, just do the best you can – and you will still be considered a success.

Some other rules and ideas he shared:

1. Never be late. So you can start on time, and more importantly, end on time.
   
2. Never use profanity.
   
3. Never criticize a teammate, that's your coaches/supervisors job.
   

He also said that the journey is far more important than the destination and gave the example of how he enjoyed the practice sessions far more than the games.

Finally, I wish to leave with this thought that Wooden shared. "Your reputation is what others believe about you, and your character is who you really are. Hopefully they are the same."